valentines day...
today is a very hard day-- memories of such love and happiness wash over me drowning me in sadness and emptiness..i hope this is the last major love holiday i have to deal with .....
january 17th would have been our first anniversary-- and now valentines day--- somehow today is worse -- maybe because i have been so sick and i am drained...
when will i ever get OVER you... over the betrayal and the intense pain of your disappearing in the dead of nite?
you run away to a place where there are no memories of us... and u retreat into your stupid computer game THE SIMS...living in a fantasty world where you control every move, every thought, every action of fake people living fake lives...
i am totally surrounded of you in every place i go...you cling to me in my dreams, and everyday there is something that reminds me of our time together...the committment ceremony... buying the new house...how happy we were...and how much in love we were...
i want to call you -- to hear your voice-- yet i fight the urge-- as i know there is nothing there to hear-- no answers to the questions that constantly plague me...no closure...just bullshit...
i want so desperately to move on from u-- to leave u FAR BEHIND ME ... i can only hope that day comes soon and i am free of you -- free of the memories, free of the pain...
when?
posted by radclyffe @ 2/14/2005 07:49:00 PM
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